This has got to be the funniest shit I ever seen in my life. This is so true to life. We listen to the friends that can’t get a man and rely on their advice in our relationships. The next thing you know they do you dirty. I watched this so much last night I had a dream about it. It may be hard to understand for my American readers, but my Caribbean people will die wid de laugh. Enjoy!
Dear V.I,
Long time reader first time correspondent. I’m in a situation that I would like your opinion of. I recently met a guy online and started to correspond with him via the website. He seemed really different he wasn’t cheesy at all we was able to hold intelligent conversations. We talked about everything, I must admit my guard was down because he seemed so decent I didn’t even think he was trying to check me. We exchanged numbers and started to talk via text and over the phone the tone of the conversations soon turned sexual I’m no prude and engaged in the conversation.
Continue reading “Ask V.I.~I’m Dating A Freak I Met Online” »
So apparently, once upon a time in a land far far away lived people that actually waited until their wedding night to make love for the first time. I heard it was a very common thing back in that era, but today chile you rarely find anyone that waits to test it out after they get married. I’m not knocking anyone that decides to wait until they’ve jumped the broom to get the niceness betwix their legs, but what if you get married and the sex leaves you feel ashamed and disrespected? Every time he takes his clothes off you cringe of the thought of him climbing on top of your limp body. You don’t understand each other’s bodies. He’s unwilling to learn what pleases you, all he does gets on top move around for a good 5 mins and he rolls over acting like you just made you squirt. Do you think if you knew that before you got married you would have still gotten married?
Continue reading “Should You Test It Out Before You Marry It..I Mean Him?” »
Ladies, we gotta do better! You decide to have a girl’s night and you head to the club. Every one’s feeling good and looking fierce. You hop on the dance floor and the next thing you know, you’re dancing with a fine one. I mean, this man is so damn fine all the bitches at the club are jealous; including your girls. So you dance, he buys you and your crew drinks, and u seem interested. You exchange digits, and wait for him to make the first call. Heffa, you just got hooked. If you’re hoping that this man is the one God sent to sweep you out of your Steve Madden’s, you’re so sadly mistaken. GOOD MEN DON’T EXIST IN THE CLUB.
Continue reading “Stop….No Good Hook-ups Here! *Vintage*” »
I totally and utterly from the bottom of my tender soul love me some Adele. When I first saw her video “Rolling In The Deep” I knew her new album was going to be another amazing album. Then I came across John Legend’s cover of the song and I must say he truly blew me away. I love me some John Legend too and I am so happy that he did this song justice. Lawd this is love right here. You can also check out Adele’s video. I just need these two people to do a duet. My life would be complete. Enjoy!
Dear V.I.,
April 2006 I met a guy, which I thought was the man of my dreams- after dating him for 3 months and turning 18, I decided I loved him enough to move out and get our own apartment. The first week was ok, after that I noticed he had a temper, very controlling and wasn’t the guy I fell in love with. But convinced he would change, I stayed. Things have gotten worse and I am in a rut. I have turned my back on my family, and feel I can’t go to them. But I am planning on moving out… But that’s not why I’m writing you- just wanted to give you a taste of what my life has been like for the last 5 years.
November 2010, I met a wonderful guy at work. He is 45, married, has 4 kids, says he is unhappy with his marriage, which I do believe he is unhappy.. I may be a naive 22 year old, but I have developed feelings for this man. We meet every couple weeks and I must say- THE SEX IS AMAZING!!! I have tried to play it cool and pretend im not completely head over heels on this guy, but I’m getting weak. He knows my situation with my prick of a boyfriend.. So here comes the part where I need your help… my lover said to me that we need to concentrate on me moving out on my own and we were going to stop having sex until i get my own place… Do you think that he is just telling me this to end it or do you think that he honestly wants me to move out.. The more i think about it- Is it realistic that a married 45 year old wants to be with a 22 year old?!? Any comments are appreciated.
Naive
Continue reading “Ask V.I.~Can I Claim Naivety on My Taxes?” »
So recently I’ve been thinking about going back to school. I’m beginning to realize that my Bachelor’s in Business Admin really isn’t worth much in today’s market. It seems to me that some employers are starting to treat a Bachelor’s degree like a High School diploma. So I guess a Associates Degree is being treated as a G.E.D from a Jr. College. Right now I feel caught between a rock and a hard place because although I think I want to go back to school, I don’t know if I’m really ready for all of that right now. If my Bachelor’s is being treated less than a Bachelor’s maybe that is the reason I’m not getting where I know I need to be.
I don’t think I’m giving myself enough credit. I also have a year of grad school under my belt. I guess I really don’t talk about that because I never got a chance to complete my degree. All because of Sallie Mae…you know what never mind. The moral of the story is…I need a better job. Actually scratch that, I need a career and holding on to this degree and not advancing isn’t helping me advance professionally. It may not be the fact that I just have a Bachelors degree. Maybe there are just too many college graduates out here. According to Time Magazine:
“In 1973, a bachelor’s degree was more of a rarity, since just 47% of high school graduates went on to college. By October 2008, that number had risen to nearly 70%. For many Americans today, a trip through college is considered as much of a birthright as a driver’s license.”
It’s so competitive out here because everyone has a degree. Plus, with the economy the way it is there are more unemployed people holding degrees than without. Those who can’t find work are going to school to at least get that piece of paper they need to get any decent job they can get. So does a degree of any kind hold weight within our struggling economy?
When I first came out of college and I applied for jobs, employers turned me down because I didn’t have enough experience. Although I had the degree I didn’t have the necessary work experience to land the job. So can someone who just got out of college suppose to get a job in their field? The whole point of getting a degree is to work in your career field. No one told me that the experience was what employers were really looking for in an applicant. I couldn’t find a job, took what was available and I was left with a college degree working with high school teenagers as a cashier at an office supply store. I was cursing my professors, my career counselor, Sallie Mae and even my mom for selling me a pipe dream.
Now, I am in a better position than I was back then but I still have some advancing to do. I probably will go back to school and finish my MBA after all. I hate starting something and not completing it. Maybe I can get where I need to be with this new piece of paper with my name in calligraphy adorned in the center. Even if an MBA doesn’t get me where I want, I know there is one thing that no one can take away from me is my education. It never hurts to learn. Isn’t learning new things what life’s about anyway?
There are just certain things you just can’t deal with when it comes to relationships. Maybe you don’t like a man who’s shorter than you, or you don’t want to date a woman that has a kid. When it comes to your relationship shopping list, you weed out the things that you dislike and if you can’t deal with it you send them packing. I don’t think I’m a picky person, but there are just some things when it comes to men in general that are strict deal breakers for me. Meaning if your ass is holding anyone of these don’t you DARE try to holla at me, because that shit would be cut short faster than you can say “V.I. I was wondering…”. NO!
11. Your FB Page Is A Memorial For All The Chicks You Done Smashed~ Have you ever met a guy that you liked and you couldn’t wait to get home to google him? You get on the computer and look him up on Facebook to find that he has over 5k friends and every last one of them has a vagina? His wall consists of chicks arguing and leaving suggestive comments on his wall. Then you go to his pictures and he has photos with a different chick in all 237 pictures. His motto in life is “Get bitches or die trying”. Yea…that dude there cannot come anywhere near me. Getting women seems like a conquest than anything else to him. He’s the type that would want to smash just to say “Yo Veronica??? Yea I smashed that chick”. More concerned with the notches on his belt than the Syphilis he’s spreading. Ol nasty STD infested ass.
10. You Have Roommate aka Your Momma~ No grown ass man needs to be living with his momma in 2011. You parading up and down in a Lexus Jeep with your momma’s name on the title. You invite a chick over to the house and there is plastic on the furniture and a china cabinet in the dining room. You gotta tip toe up the stairs with your chick because you don’t wanna wake your momma…I mean your roommate up at 8:30pm. Your too damn grown to be writing your name on the orange juice dude. Get up out the house and be a man. You can’t possibly think you can court me right? You see what they’re trying to do is find a new momma. You get with them and they move from their momma’s house to yours. Dude just looking for someone to treat him like his momma does. Naw sir…you need to try that with those other chicks cause this chick here ain’t about that life. If you can’t bring nothing, but a penis to the table you are of no value to me. Good Day Sir!
9. You have Your Own Basketball Team With a few Assistant Coaches~ I don’t have kids, and in a perfect world I would meet a man with no kids and we can build the dream together. So since we don’t live in a perfect world, at this age I think it’s damn near impossible finding a man without at least one child. I can handle one or even two, but when your ass has 5 and up that is where I gotta draw the line. Not only do you have all those kids you have more than one baby mother? So not only do I have to deal with all your kids disliking me for coming my happy ass in the picture I got your baby mommas hating me in the process? I’m sorry, but I can’t deal with all that drama. I don’t do drama and I damn sure don’t want none. So if you know that you have too much going on in your life then skip over me. I rather spend the rest of my life alone with 18 cats and a parakeet than your 12 children and 8 baby mommas. I refuse to be a statistic.
Continue reading “My Top 11 Deal Breakers In Relationships” »
So I don’t like people…ok wait let me rephrase that. I am shy around people I don’t know. Yes I am shy. I remember back in the day I could be in a room filled with people and I would have been the chick holding up the wall in the corner. As I got older I thought I grew out of it a little until technology hit my life. Now being anti-social has nothing to do with being shy and more to do with what the hell is going on twitter and facebook. *Side note* Today marks the 5 year anniversary since Twitter has launch* See only a damn internet junkie would know some dumb shit like that. No matter where I go I whip out the smart phone and troll the internet. Technology may have made a lot of us into social retards.
Continue reading “Technology May Have Destroyed My Social Life” »
When I think of a man with penis power; I smile. That’s someone that has enough to fill the black hole of pleasure and can still work those hips in a manly way. I once wrote a blog about an experience I encountered, which broke it down that size doesn’t always matter. While, I still stand with this sort of insane idea, I have run into the brothas that have clearly misunderstood what I meant. Although your woman pleaser is hanging short, shriveled and to the left, there is no reason you can’t screw the Aqua Velva out of someone like you’re packing like the big dawgs. Even though you can deliver when needed, there are just some positions a petite man shouldn’t even expect a woman to go. *Spanking hand* No!
Continue reading “His Ego Ain’t That Big *Vintage*” »
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