Dear V.I.,
About 2 years ago i ended a very bad long term relationship…it ended very badly. I had a male friend who helped me through it all…This male friend was so good to me one thing lead to another with all the late night talking etc. We ended up sleeping together then i learned he had a woman he loved but was not in a relationship with in another state. I respected that and when she called i remained quiet besides i did not want to be in a relationship. We agreed to be fuck buddies. Things got heated up and the love word was exchanged later into the year.
Well  I got pregnant and we decided to have the baby by this time the long distance woman he loved was gone no calls no text nothing. Sadly i lost the baby at 5 months he was not there to see her because i didn’t call him …..i was hurt and shocked.I spoke to him once i was out the hospital, later that year i got pregnant again at 6 months i lost the baby once again he wasn’t there because i couldn’t call him till after.He seemed hurt but okay with not being there. After the last baby he hasn’t touched me at all its been 6 months since we had sex.He‘s is very stressed he says he has a lot going on in his life so i understood kept my pussy on lock with the exception of my hand and toys.Occasionally i suck his dick and he never makes an effort to please me once again i decided it was the stress and put my trust in him. Today i went though his things which is wrong in a sense but i am sucking your dick kissing your lips so i feel i have the right 2!! I found an instant message between him and a girl he said was his friend saying he could come over and eat her pussy at such and such time. The way they spoke it didnt seem like the first time. Should i work it out ..talk to him about what went wrong? if me losing the baby has anything to do with this? or just leave? I love him i want you to understand that but i dont wanna be his fool…
Thanks
Confused and Unsure
Dear Confused &  Unsure,
First off, I want to say you’re a strong woman. The difficulty of loosing not one but two babies will be taxing on any woman. Now…let me dissect this and give you my honest opinion. GET THE F*CK OUT. At the beginning of the letter you stated that you were going through a rough time and you confided in him. That was his game plan. He got you at a weak moment and magically your panties came off. Men love when a chick comes to them in a vulnerable state of mind. That gives him easy access to be that “friend” yet he prays you get so weak you give up the pussy. I don’t know him, but I think having sex with you was something he wanted from the jump and that was the perfect opportunity of him to make his move.
I’m sorry to say this but you made a very common mistake. You fell in love with the rebound. YOU NEVER EVER EVER FALL IN LOVE WITH THE REBOUND PERSON. I think the fact that he was giving you that much needed attention and he was handing you the dick, your heart started thinking for your mind. As far as the 1st pregnancy I don’t know if it was a “mistake” or not but deep down I think you felt that was a way to keep that man. You knew the circumstances of how you got him, and you felt the need to hold onto him. The fact that you told him you lost the baby #2 and he felt okay for not being there is a red flag. I don’t think he wanted baby #2. Any man that really wanted to be there would kick themselves for not being there.
Now let’s talk about the meat of this shit, the other chick. Boo, that man is, has and will continue to cheat on you. You can talk, cry, beg until you’re blue in the face he will still do what he wants to do. You found concrete evidence that he’s not only cheating, but eating some other girl’s pussy. Naw son…that’s not the shit at all. You loosing the baby has nothing to do with him cheating. That girl that you said he was talking to long distance in my opinion was his girl. You were the chick he was cheating with, and eventually got caught up. Now you’re the main chick and of course if he disrespected that relationship that is a clear cut sign that his ass is more likely to disrespect the one with you. Having kids for him is not going to save your relationship. You can’t change a person that doesn’t want to change. This has to be something he wants to do. If you’ve been down this road with him before and he’s still doing the same shit, he doesn’t respect the relationship. Get out!!!
I hope I’ve helped you in some way. Naturally the decision is yours to make. I really do hope you get things resolved that will better suit you. Keep me updated on what happens.
V.I.
xoxoxoxoxo
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