Ask V.I.~ Tears Don't Dry On Their Own

Dear V.I.,

I decided to come to you because I don’t know who else to talk to. About a year ago I met this guy and we started dating. Every thing was going great for the first 4 months then he started acting differently. I suspected he was cheating but I wasn’t sure. One day while we were going out to eat I found a condom under the passenger seat. He said that his brother might have accidentally dropped it while he was giving him a lift. I was so naive, I didn’t really press the issue any furthur.

I then started noticing whenever I wanted to spend the night at his place, he always made up some excuse. Also, he would never leave his phone unattended whenever I was around. Every time I asked him if he was cheating he would always tell me it was all in my head. So one night I decided to do something I never thought I would ever do. I went over to his place and just stayed there to see if  he would show up alone at the apartment. I know that was wrong of me, but I wanted to know. I stayed there for 4 hours just waiting. He finally pulls up and there is a girl with him. I was so angry I ran up to them cursing and asking him what’s going on. That’s when I noticed that the girl was pregnant!!! She asked me who was I and I said I was his girlfriend. He quickly told her that I was not his girlfriend and I’ve been stalking him for weeks. He said that the girl was his girlfriend and their about to have their first child. I was so crushed I started crying and begging him right in front of her, basically looking like a fool. They left me crying outside feeling like shit.

For days I tried calling him so he can explain what was really going on. He ignored my calls and eventually changed his number. It’s been a year now and I still have feelings for him. I want him back!! I know I sound crazy but I do. I haven’t dated anyone since him and I don’t really care to date. He’s the person I want to be with, I just don’t know how let him know this. Help me!!

Thanks,

Tear Stained Pillow

Dear Tear Stained Pillow,

Sweetheart it’s been a year, you need to snap the hell out of this? The man didn’t want to be with you, or he would be with you. He told you in no uncertain terms that he was in a relationship with this other chick. Basically embarrassing the hell out of you. Let’s face it, you embarrassed yourself running up to him like you’re in a Lifetime movie. He was showing signs that he was doing something else, you just didn’t want to believe it. That’s why you continuously wanted more proof. You didn’t want to believe this man could be a dog, even though he was clearly showing that he was one. Also, the chick was pregnant. PREGNANT, meaning that n*gga on lock for the rest of his life.

I know it’s hard when someone we’re digging isn’t doing right by us, but you have to have some sort of standards. He was an ass and he showed his ass. He lied to you for months, didn’t respect you or his baby momma because he was lying to her too. A dude like that isn’t a man, and boo that is what you need in your life. I’m not sure why you feel like you need to settle for less, but no one should have to settle. You wasted a whole year crying over this dude, when you could have lived your life. You should never  loose yourself for a man no matter how fine , sweet or big his dick stands. So dust the dirt off your shoulders and buck the f*ck up. You’re too cute for all that.

I really hope I’ve helped you in some way. The decision is ultimately yours to make, so I hope you make the right one that will be in your best interest. Keep me posted.

Thanks

V.I.

xoxoxoxoxo