How Do Men Deal With A Cheating Woman?

When people hear that someone has cheated in a relationship they always assume it’s the guys’ fault. We all know that some men aren’t worth a damn, but there are a lot of women out here that don’t give a shit. Studies have actually shown that because women are more emotional creatures they have a tendency to cheat more than men. It doesn’t always start as a physical act. There are a lot of women that cheat emotionally and think as long as she’s not actually having sex it doesn’t count. No matter how you cheat it’s still cheating. Fellas, what do you do when you’ve been faithful and you find out your woman has cheated? Do you stay and try to make it work or do you kick her to the curb and deal with your broken heart?

I’ve admitted I’ve cheated  in a past relationship, and I swear if I knew what I know now I would have never done it. It started out as an emotional thing and lead to something else. I regret doing that because truthfully it was a waste of time, but more importantly I truly hurt someone I cared about. Where I’m from we always say ” A man can give card, but he can’t take it”. This basically means a man can cheat, but the second he’s cheated on the world has stopped because his feelings and ego is battered and bruised. The fact is women cheat the majority of the time because there is intimacy lacking in their relationship. He isn’t the total package so she finds solace in someone that gives her the attention she’s craving. It’s much harder to deal with a woman that has cheated based on emotions because of the feelings she may have developed for the other person. How can you stay with someone that loves someone else?

What about the men that have been faithful to their women and still get cheated on? How can he cope with the hurt? Most men that have been cheated on can’t stay in a relationship where there is no trust, unlike women. Some women can get cheated on 5 ways from Sunday and still stick it out even though they don’t trust him any longer. Just the thought of another man with his woman is enough to make a man flip. Now you’re sending a bruised man into the world where it will be so difficult for a good woman to come into his life. You’re actions always dictate what will happen in the lives of others.

In my opinion I don’t think men really get over being cheated on. Women can eventually deal with it, but I think it’s more about the ego when it comes to men. If you’ve been cheated on you often ask yourself “what did I do wrong”? Sometimes there is a valid answer and sometimes there isn’t. There are people out here that just make selfish decisions and don’t realize it until they’ve gotten caught. A man can cheat and a woman knows right away. A woman can cheat and you never know it for years, unless she lets you know. Fellas, going out and hurting other women because one chick hurt you does not solve the issue. Men have a tendency of never dealing with their feelings. They let things fester and eventually it damages them emotionally.

If you ever find yourself in an instance where you’ve found your partner has been unfaithful please don’t take it out on the next woman you meet. It’s not fair to her because you haven’t gotten over the infidelity. Allow yourself to heal and realize that not all women are out to break your heart. In love and relationships we do so much gambling because we really don’t know how it will turn out. All we can do is pray for the best and deal with the worst. If you know you’re unable to deal with the worse it might be time to exit from the situation. Being in a relationship with someone that has broken your trust is a hard pill to swallow, you can either deal with it or move on. Dealing and staying with it shows forgiveness, leaving and moving on knowing that the person wasn’t right for you shows maturity and acceptance. We can’t dictate how someone loves us, but we can dictate how we allow them to treat us.

Holla at me: Fellas, have you ever been cheated on? If so how did you deal with it?

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23 thoughts on “How Do Men Deal With A Cheating Woman?

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention How Do Men Deal With A Cheating Woman? -- Topsy.com

  2. I have been through and quiet as it is kept, most guys have gone through it, knowingly and unknowingly. I had trust issues in the beginning after finding out. It wasnt until some time and space went by where I was able to function or be around her. In the back of my mind, it was always there. Personally, I didnt want her trying to make it up to me. I didnt want her false expressions of affection. I just needed her to keep her distance for a while. Afterwards, I was able to forgive and move on. It took some time and she had to deal with me throwing shade from time to time because it took awhile for me to just not think about it. The jacked up part about it was the fact that I was going to school at night after working 10-11 hour days. She complained about spending time when I was trying to make something happen with school. We eventually went our separate ways. She says she regrets it to this day but I just yawn at it. Im just glad I didnt use that situation as a excuse to not be faithful in relationships for the future.

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  4. Wow…men actually feel! J/k. See we women don’t see or hear what men are saying so some women seek other men to provide what their relationship is lacking. It’s sad but the reality is, if a woman speaks about her concerns in a relationship and some things does not change, we tend to feel you don’t love us enough, so what we do? Find someone else who will tell us all we want to hear based on all we told them about you (the things you don’t do that we like). However, fortunately, all women are not the same, which is a great thing.

  5. Ive been cheated on by every girl Ive ever been with, notice i say girl… with the ones i didnt realy cara bout it was just an upset feeling, with the few i was in love with.. i was desciated sometimes i couldent even eat or sleep at all, those pains never went away an d in a sense i never delt with those pains i just moved on. Im not the cheat type, and yeah i know every guy says that but i dont claim 2 be what i am not, but for me the ones i cared about destroyed me in ways i don’t know how 2 describe, i wanted 2 not go on,fade away, stop breathing, even die. Hell i tryed 2 off my self more than a few times, thank god i didnt have a gun. but thats how cheating is for me. FYI about my grammar i was unaware i couldent go back and spell check so i wont fixing typos, dont know why some one made this website uneditable….

  6. hi my girl friend that is now my wife cheated on me because of money i’m a immegrant living in america so i came to america for a better life come to no it i find my self in of a long lasting relationship ever since i was in high school i move out of state at that time she was in school i was in school stuff was Going well so i deside to move back to new york my girlfriend witch is my socal wife now inspired me to move back to nyc to live with her on or mother at first i Did not think it would be a good idea at first any i still went to live with her ofter even thing times was getting hard for me living there with her mom plus being married at the same time she my socal wife deside she is not Going to take it any more go and craigslist to date new guys to get money just because i cant find a job now you see that ….i check her phone one day on thats the day i find out she was cheating on me….

  7. hi my girl friend that is now my wife cheated on me because of money i’m a immegrant living in america so i came to america for a better life come to no it i find my self in of a long lasting relationship ever since i was in high school i move out of state at that time she was in school i was in school stuff was Going well so i deside to move back to new york my girlfriend witch is my socal wife now inspired me to move back to nyc to live with her on or mother at first i Did not think it would be a good idea at first any i still went to live with her ofter even thing times was getting hard for me living there with her mom plus being married at the same time she my socal wife deside she is not Going to take it any more go and craigslist to date new guys to get money just because i cant find a job now you see that ….i check her phone one day on thats the day i find out she was cheating on me….Do i leave her no because i’m trying to get my green card to find a better living its a hard pill to swallow women….

  8. It’s been over 6 months since she has cheated. She didn’t just cheat once but multiple times with the same guy for months. She swore she would do everything right cried her eyes out said she would do anything and everything. I wasn’t working for a long time when this happened so this is like u said I blame some of it on myself. She has changed in that she comes home straight after work for the most part. Doesn’t stay out late which is great but I still worry. She acted wonderful for like 2 months but now she’s getting sick of always telling me everything. Any advice?

  9. My girl cheated on me. She had sex with someone she knew from high school. He has a daughter and a baby mother already. He’s three years younger than her. She slept with him and today is pregnant with twins. It hurts and it’s disappointing. It’s disappointing because WE never were intimate. She confessed a stance of celibacy. She wanted to wait. I respected that and literally in one damn night, her stance was thrown out the window and what we never did, was done with someone because of the way he physically looked. Taller, fairer skin,…and she submitted to him physically. She cried to me and apologized. I’m not mad at her. I’m more disappointed and I’m trying to figure out how do I get over this. It’s not the first time this has happened to me before. Are we really friends now? What are we? I feel empty…what I thought would be, I guess is not to be.

  10. I have just been cheated on twice, she has stated that it is my fault because my communication isn’t the greatest in the relationship, so she said she was lonely and got with a guy she dated a long time ago. now just recently she went to her grandma house to see her and she lives a few states away she went and had sex with her ex and she comes back and says she may have feelings for him now again, but she wants to work it out with me but she is still talking to him and I feel that if she is giving a chance she would do it again. so I don’t know how to handle this situation cause I never had cheated before. any help would be great

    • Hi James,

      I have to second what V.I. has said. Run! Get out of that toxic relationship! And this is coming from a girl who has recently cheated on her loving boyfriend. If she is not wrecked with guilt and shame, then it will be very hard for you to build a healthy relationship with her. We all fall in “love” (and i put quotes because we may think we are in love but actually aren’t. Around the corner might be something better, but God is trying to get u to step up and have the power to LET that into your life. Not all good things are handed to us. We have to do work to earn some good things. But know there is power is letting letting someone go if you realize they are not right for you) with people that are not right for us. To elaborate on my story, I’m 20. I was at a party this summer and, I don’t drink much, so I got really drunk and thought I was around good people. Some of my boyfriend’s fraternity brothers were there, and by the end of the night I went to sleep on the couch and one of his brothers slipped in behind me and held me tight. He started caressing my body and then it happened. We didn’t go through all of the motions of sex, but he put “it” in. The next morning I felt so much shame. I love my boyfriend, and never thought I’d become “that” person. The moment I woke up I called him and told him because I cared about him and his feelings. I wanted him to know what happened and I wanted to make sure I was the one who told him. I feared hurting his confidence, and wanted to give him the chance to stand on his own two feet and kick me to the curb if that’s what he needed to do in order to move on from this and grow. I felt worthless. I felt like I became the person people in society and I have been fighting so hard to avoid. The cheater. I barely knew the guy I cheated on my boyfriend with and am not even physically attracted to him. And I think that is part of the reason why I feel so “dirty”. My boyfriend and I started dating a few months ago and this all happened a few days ago. Despite dating for a short period of time we decided to stay together even though we would be physically a part for the whole summer break. Luckily, I’m going to visit him in a day and I want to tell him everything and also tell him what I think he deserves and see if he still thinks I meet those standards still. I would never have done it if I was sober. And my feeling of disappointment and shame eat at me during some point in the day. He told me he still wants to be with me but I know a lot of work will need to be done, on my part, to regain his trust and full forgiveness. And a lot of work will also need to be done for me to forgive myself.

      I guess what I’m trying to get at James is sometimes people make mistakes, but if they can’t acknowledge that what they did was wrong. If they can’t assess what led them to do it, and then take the steps to ensure that they never get to that point again. You should leave. You deserve to be treated better than that. Believe it or not, by stepping away you may be doing the both you a favor. Aside from all of the positives you will gain (peace, power, a better relationship…etc) you will also teach her that cheating is wrong. You be creating one more positive person in this world. She must come to the realization that she can’t treat people like that, and that it’s wrong.

      Hope this helps you, those who have been cheated on, and those who have cheated and feel bad for doing it. Feel free to ask me to elaborate on certain things. I have a lot going through my mind after this happened, I’ve been surfing the web trying to learn how to forgive myself and figure out how I may have hurt him. However, I don’t want to bombard all of you with that in one post.

      Lastly, when my boyfriend told me he forgave me and didn’t want to leave me I really cherished that, and made a promise to myself that I’d never step out on him again. Notice that I made the promise to myself. Actions speak louder than words and I think he’d rather want me to prove that I won’t do it again rather than just say it. If ur girlfriend hasn’t appreciated your forgiveness realize that it has nothing to do with you, but that she may need to experience some personal growth.

      best,

      Iris

  11. Hi James. First and foremost your girl ain’t shit. The fact that she did it twice and doesn’t feel bad about telling you that shit and throwing it in your face is messed up. She told you loud and clear she slept with her ex and now she may have feelings for him again. Get the hell out of this relationship. She doesn’t respect you and your feelings so screw her. You deserve someone who takes your feelings into consideration, not trample on them like they give not a got damn. DUMP THAT TRICK!!!!!!!

  12. I think that is among the so much vital information for me.
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  13. My fiancé just left me for no good reason… Ran back to Sweden. But when we first met it was fireworks for him but I had my doubts, we met while he traveled here for a few days then went home. so while we weren’t officially together since he was a continent away bu kept in contact and he flew me out there for a month and wanted me to be exclusive so I said I would try and I ended up sleeping with a guy I use to date. I regretted t, confessed and apoogized purfusely. I’m not a cheater and never have been. From that moment on I wasn’t unsure about what I wanted and next time he came into town, we became official then later engaged. I loved that man w all my heart. But just after 3 months and only 3 weeks if that here w me… He flipped and said he didn’t love me anymore:( I’ve been nothing but honest and true to him since that one horrible mistake a year ago. And he didn’t say that’s why he left but I can’t help thinkin that’s the real reason. I just couldn’t jump in heart first after just meeting someone. I wasn’t ready and scared of dating someone so far away. But I’ll always regret it.

  14. Girl here…started seeing guy who was cheated on by wife….he’s been divorced 13 YEARS. Great guy however think he just wants sex buddy. I texted him last night and said I’m a nice person and so are you…I don’t do sex buddies …maybe you do and that is your business,.my business is to not be something I don’t want to be. Hasn’t text back and yes it hurts ….maybe some people can do that…I think it’s shallow and not respectful….I guess my point is if not ready to trust after being cheated on have the courtesy to be honest to next person so they know what they are getting into…keep your dignity treat people and you will probably eventually find a passionate and satisfying relationship…still learning and open…I don’t want to shut off love because then what is left?

  15. That’s sad anyways men can be so selfish at times and take women for granted. Working all the time and putting so much for the home life on the women despite her career and/or her stay at home mom duties! Everything becomes a chore sex, conversations, day to day task! Next thing you know a woman seeks emotional comfort and or attention elsewhere . I think it’s the mans fault for taking his lady for granted

    • I am responding to your statement, I think it is a very selfish statement. as men if we don’t make a certain amount of money women uses that as an excuse to find a guy who can give them the things they want, on the other hand unless your a rich person you must work hard. how about looking at the fact that your man is working hard for you and not another woman that would appreciate his effort and would not be as selfish as you think. A good woman would not cheat on her man no matter the circumstances a goods woman walks away and keeps her dignity intact. if your a mom your doing your job not for your husband but your children, so being a good mom to your kids should be an excuse to cheat? doing mom duties’ is a responsibility as well as a father being a father is his responsibility. a good person talks about there emotions to there mate as well as a woman might be feeling neglected because of her man working long hours at work he may fell unappreciated because he girl does not see his effort. bottom line if you feel you want to be with another guy for attention look at your kids and ask your self who is making a way for you to be able to take care of your kids and not in a shelter with nowhere to live, is it your husband or the new guy???

  16. My wife and I dated for many years before we got married. During that time she cheated on me 4 times that I know of, and that she admits to. She claims deep down she loved me the entire time but had massive self esteem issues. I “forgave” her, we graduated from college, and have now been married for 20 years. During that entire time it has still gnawed at the back of my mind, the trust has never been there. We’ve talked about it many times, I’ve always been more concerned with the emotion of the cheating than the sex. But I have everything well documented, and now the reckoning is at hand. I’m now very well off and her family knows nothing of what she did. They think I’m a saint who rescued a trouble girl (which is partially true). I told her if I find out if she ever cheats (or cheated) on me while married her entire family will have the sordid details of her past and she will be divorced, broke, and alone. Will she cheat on me again? I don’t know, and I don’t care anymore really, I only know the endgame that will result. I’ve never cheated on her…

    Never underestimate the resentment of a husband.

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