Ask V.I.~Help! My Future Mother-in-law is Crazy

I been dating this guy officially 3 months, but we were unofficially for 6 months. I’m 22 and he is 19 we are very close and build a close relationship and friendship together. I have this ideal of how I want a relationship with my husband and our families to go, but I’m coming to reality that maybe every thing isn’t going to be perfect. He has met some of my family just as I have met some of his family. Meeting his mom has always been a hi and bye thing. So I guess I came over on the wrong day and as soon as I walked in her house I knew something wasn’t right with all of the beer bottles. I went up to his room and before I can get comfortable and take my jacket off she was up stairs in my face drunk telling me what she expects from me and talking about little arguments me and him has have. I notice that he tells her everything at this point I had a conversation about not having his mom know everything because she feels as tho she can put her two scents in when they are not needed. She was loud cursing and having her finger in my face. She went on for about 20 mins of how his father treated her and things he told her and that she likes me for a daughter in law but she doesn’t want me playing with her son heart and things. He was there and had to tell her couple of times can she back up out my face and leave the room. I didn’t say anything to her because I felt tho I was raised not to disrespect adults and I would lose him if I did. I really was upset with everything that happen he said sorry for his mom but I felt like that wasn’t enough. Friends said I should just avoid her but that’s his mom so how long can I do that? I thought about not being with him because of it cause it probably wont be the last time. I don’t know.


Dealing With A Crazy

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Ask V.I.~ Do You Think He’s No Good?

Dear V.I.,

I need to ask your advice on something. My boyfriend and I have been having problems in our relationship and I notice that he isn’t as attentive as he use to be. I became suspicious and asked him about it and he said he has no clue in what I was talking about. I brushed it off until one day I got a call on my cell phone from this chick. She said just delivered a baby and the child belongs to my boyfriend. I asked him about it and he said it was just a girl that was trying to get with him, but he told her he was in a relationship with me. He said she’s just telling me that just to make me mad and possibly break up with him. He reassured me that I was the only one and he has no kids by another woman.

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Ask V.I.~See…My Girl Got a Girlfriend…Well Kinda

Hi V.I.:

I want to have a threesome with one of my girl’s friends. I have brought up the subject in a playful manner and tried to gauge her response. Can the readers of Candy Diaries please tell me what approach I should use to ask my girl to have a threesome with one of her friends? Or better yet, if I were your man what would it take for me to convince you to have a threesome with your friend. I really think this will broaden our horizons and enhance the sex in our relationship. Now I know the majority of you will be ,…’uggh I wish you would’…but lets be real, there is a freak in you so help me out.


Horny As Hell

Dear H.A.H,

*In my Martin voice* Um… somebody done told you wrong. Let’s pretend this is real life right now. Do you think your girl is gonna consent to you having sex with her homegirl? Damn if it’s a threesome, in my opinion  the minute you tell your girl you wanna have a threesome with her and her friend the first thing she might think is that you been wanting to f*ck ol girl all this time and using the threesome to do it. Hey, I just might be the only one thinking that. Boo, if you wanna do a threesome more power to you, but you should know the type of woman you’re with also. Most chicks in committed relationships ain’t trying to have her man and her friend getting all natural with each other regardless if she’s in the room or not.

If you were in a jump off situation and you wanted to invite her friend  along for the ride…cool, but do you think things will be the same after you engage with sex between friends? Naw brah…can you say ackward as hell? I say keep your mouth shut about the friend. If she’s down with the threesome thing hire a clean looking escort or something. Bringing a friend into the mix will not only cause  problems in the long run but might also f*ck up their friendship. Hell you might enjoy f*cking the friend more than your girl and then the next thing you know ya’ll having your own secret relationship going on. It’s not worth the headache. The safest solutions is  to get an escort dude…pay her, f*ck her then tell her get the f*ck on!!!

I’ve really hoped I’ve helped you in some way. I am not an expert, I just give my opinions as I see fit. The decision is ultimately yours to make, so I hope you make one that is in your best interest. Keep me posted!

Ask V.I.~The Pimp In Him Ain’t Dead


I really need your advice on my situation..I was recently reunited with my ex whom I haven’t seen or heard from in 7yrs. We were young when we were together and we did a lot of grown woman and man things that produced a child that was miscarried I figure he  left me because I was pregnant, but that was not the case. He got locked up and had been trying to find me all theses years. Now that we have reunited its like we are back to where we were, except the fact that he had girlfriends or chicks that he engaged in acts with within the time we did get back together. He claims his love for me all the time but im not sure if he’s in love with me. Its only been a year since he been out and I’ve been there from the beginning til this day holding him down, but he’s admitted to stepping out on me and now im not trusting him.

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Ask V.I.~ My Past Stepped Into My Present

Hi V.I.,

About 5 years ago I was dating this guy and I really treated him badly. He was ready for a serious relationship, but I was just into having fun. I told him I wasn’t where he was at, and we ended the relationship. About a week ago I bumped into him while I was out having lunch with my co-workers. Time has definitely done him well. He is now a computer programmer and has a wife and a baby. For some reason I can’t stop thinking about him. I’m currently not involved with anyone, and the immature 22 year is no longer. I feel like I let a great one go and I feel like I made a terrible mistake. Should I call him and let him know my feelings or should I let it go?

Formerly Immature

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Ask V.I.~ Do I Have An Issue?

Hi V.I.,

What’s a girl to do?. I’ll be 26 years old next month and I have issues. Now I know there is no perfect man out there for me. I’m not the perfect woman either. At 25 years old I’m starting to feel like I want something everlasting and real. I’ve been in 5 relationships all spread out from the age of 16 till now 25.

The first relationship began when I was 16 years old. He was my boo and I was in love. Well at least at the moment I thought I was. He treated me like a queen buying me everything I wanted and needed. Showing me off at all the clubs I realized after 2 years & some weight gain I was just a trophy. Although we we’re living together he had already packed his things and left but we were still together. When cheating and lying became involved I left the relationship.

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Ask V.I.~ Married Yet Still Single

Hi V.I.,

Since this is where my wife seems to air all of our problems out, I thought I might get involved. Recently, my wife and I have been have been growing distant in our relationship. In all actuality, I have found someone else that makes me happy. She is an island girl. I love to hear the way she talks, I love her conversation, I love her smile, and I love the way she does those ‘Jamaican’dances. On the other hand, the sound of my wife’s voice has become painstakingly irritable. My boy said that I should leave her but I asked him if he didn’t see the Benz parked outside or in fact the layout of my condo; a divorce won’t be cheap.

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Ask V.I.~ Could He Be An Addict?

Dear V.I.,

I recently came to a dilemma. I was nonchalantly looking through my internet history, and I found a couple of porn sites. I know I didn’t watch it because it was dated last Sunday, and I was at church in the morning (lol, the irony of it all amuses me). However, my boyfriend was in my apartment, and I went to church alone. I confronted him about it last night on the phone, he apologized (nonchalantly) and I am furious. I don’t understand why. I feel very betrayed I guess, and disrespected. But I have watched porn from time to time (so there is some level of hypocrisy), and I have felt guilty, but the thought of him watching it on my computer, then making ‘love’ to me about 2 hours later is kind of wrong to me.

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Ask V.I.~ Tears Don't Dry On Their Own

Dear V.I.,

I decided to come to you because I don’t know who else to talk to. About a year ago I met this guy and we started dating. Every thing was going great for the first 4 months then he started acting differently. I suspected he was cheating but I wasn’t sure. One day while we were going out to eat I found a condom under the passenger seat. He said that his brother might have accidentally dropped it while he was giving him a lift. I was so naive, I didn’t really press the issue any furthur.

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New Feature~ ASK V.I

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Ok folks…I’m thinking about trying this. I get so many emails, Facebook and BBM questions by readers seeking advice, so I’ve decided to make this a new segment. ASK V.I !!!!! If you have any questions or you just need advice feel free to contact me. You can use an alias when submitting or you can use your real identity…it’s up to you. I will post 2 questions every Friday and answer them for everyone to see. This is the time to get all the freaky or troublesome questions out the way. FREE ADVICE…what’s better than that?

To get in contact with me is very easy. All you have to do is click the Contact page link, fill out the simple form and that’s it. I’ll pick out the best 2 questions of the week and post it. Even if your questions aren’t chosen I will still answer your emails personally. So let’s get this cracking. Remember to tell a friend…Candy Diaries is about healing, helping, and heating up the joint.

Love V.I