We all know that when it comes to Facebook and relationships, the two just don’t go together. Facebook has ended more relationships than Superhead did in the 90’s. In divorce proceedings facebook drama has been used as evidence. Facebook ruins lives, but it’s also beginning to enrich the lonely. I’ve realized that Facebook Groups are the new form of online dating. Join the right group and your social calendar will be filled like never before, hence a better way to meet people. The question I have is facebook dating equivalent to facebook breakups? If you allow facebook to hook you up is it easier for facebook to break you up?
I’m actually a member of a few facebook groups and I can honestly say I can see why it’s so easy for people to hook up. If you’re active in a particular group you sort of create a bond with a few members. Although you’ve probably never met most of them, you have a few that you can kick it with online. Based off of you pics, conversation and your relationship status the inbox pimpin begins. Now I ain’t against inbox pimpin…if anything it makes the work day go by faster, but I’ve seen and read the thirst and it amuses me. The thing about inbox pimpin is that if you’re being inboxed, imagine how many other women in the group getting the same messages from these men? Either way their messages may hit a spot and then the realness happens. Many people in these facebook groups decide to hang out on an individual basis away from the group. Now this is usually done in secret because “they don’t want everyone all up in their business.” Now if things are cool in person that’s when the relationship starts. Either it’s a sexual one or one where they’re really trying to get to know one another outside of the internet.
A lot of these relationships turn out to be sexual ones because with all the freedom of speech in these groups, folks can tell who’s sexually frustrated and who’s not. If you exhibit frustration then chances are you will be accosted with offers of penis and whatnot. If it’s a genuine attraction then you never know what can come of it, but you also have to keep an open mind of where it possibly will not go. If you do end up in a relationship and things are beautiful then that’s wonderful. What happens if things end and you’re both still members in this group? Can you agree to FB group chat amicably? Should one person leave the group or should you both decide to leave? It can become very messy being in an open forum group with someone you had a relationship with, especially if it ended badly.
I’m not opposed to dating within Facebook, but at the same time you have to agree not to allow Facebook be the demise of your relationship. The people in these relationships allow social media *not only facebook* to ruin their relationships. Your relationship has to be stronger than the shit found on the internet. It’s so easy to get into messy shit on the internet, but you can control it if you choose to. So if you’re in search of something that can possibly fun then join one of these facebook groups. The main goal is to not expect much, but if you get something popping then enjoy it for what it is and just go with the flow. You never know where it might lead.
Holla at me: Have you ever started dating someone you met on Facebook? How did it go?
*In my Sophia from Golden Girls voice* Picture it…you’re out in the park having lunch alone. A handsome stranger walks up to you and engages you in small talk. He makes you blush and you give him your number. He calls you later on that evening and and you talk about going out on a date that weekend. You’re excited because let’s face it you haven’t been on a date since Lil Kim’s breasts were real. Before you pick out your “let him imagine me nekkid” dress you pull out your computer and Google the sweet guy you have a hot date with. You find out he has filed for bankruptcy twice, wanted for child support in 3 states and lives with a woman that shares his last name *momma or wife you pick* either way not a good sign. So what do you do with this tidbit of information? Do you ignore what you read and go out with him anyway? Do you call Mr. Wonderful back and tell him to take a long walk off a short pier? Does Google really help or harm your love life?
We’ve all have had some run in with a cheater, or we might have been the one that cheated. It is a hard ass thing to find out the person, who you “trusted” betrayed that trust in some form or the other. Emotions run high when we find out that bitch ass man/woman went behind our back and screwed someone else. I posed the question on twitter and facebook; “What is the most outrageous thing you ever did to get back at someone that cheated on you?” The responses where crazy funny to me.
Last time on Candy Diaries I expressed how I was in love with my best-friend brother and I expressed that to Twon (the brother). One day I logged on Facebook and received this instant message from him:
T’Bo Be Fxckin Around
man no you not dat was a ACCIDENT pure horny shit quit playin wit me i have sumbdy and dat aint changing.
I have a huge problem on my hand! I’m in love with my bestfriend’s brother after 8+ years of us calling each other brother and sister. I have always liked him since we meet in high school but never acted on it because he is my bestfriends brother and I didn’t want to interfere with our friendship. So I just put my feelings under the rug of 8 years until recently!