Ask V.I.~ I Lied And Told Him That He Is The Father

family walking down the street

Hi V.I.,

I just need to unburden myself to someone. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years and we have a 9 month old daughter. During our relationship I can admit that I haven’t been very faithful to him. The sex isn’t stimulating to me. He’s a good guy, but when it comes to sex he’s very one-dimensional. So, I started getting it elsewhere. I was doing pretty good until I started feeling sick and throwing up all the time. I thought I had the flu until I went to the doctor and she did a urine test. I was pregnant and didn’t know what to do. I had to make the decision if I should keep the child when I wasn’t sure who was my child’s father. I decided to tell my boyfriend it was his child. He was more stable financially than the other guy and frankly I knew he would be there and provide for her the way she needed to be cared for.

Now that my little girl is growing into her features I’m noticing that she resembles the other guy than her “father”. As a matter of fact she looks like his 2-year-old son. I’m so afraid that my boyfriend will question her looks. Last week he said that it’s interesting that she’s not getting any darker and wonders where she got her hazel eyes. I lied and told him that my grandmother had the same eyes so she got it from my side. I am so afraid that he’ll find out. He loves her so much and she adores her daddy. How can I tell him that he’s not the father? Should I take this to the grave while never telling him and her the truth? Should I tell him and risk him leaving us and having no one to provide for us? Please help me.

Living a Lie

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And The Oscar Goes To….. *Vintage*

I have decided to pay homage to all the actresses that can always give a commanding performance under the most demanding circumstances. Yes, I am talking about every woman that had to fake an orgasm for the benefit of her partner. Let’s face facts, some women fake it for one of two reasons: 1) We probably don’t want hurt your ego by letting you know nothing was accomplished. 2) We are just ready for you to stop wasting your pumping energy so we can watch Oprah or whatever Soap is on at the time. (Sorry I don’t do soaps or Oprah, but do you boo).

So you know at this time I always admit what I have done. Well, I have faked it on several occasions. I am not ashamed, for I had to do what I had to do. I don’t think it is a bad thing either. The majority of the time I did it, I was feeding his ego. And of course he had no clue, that I was bamboozling him. On one occasion I just couldn’t fake the funk any longer, I told him that I could not under any circumstances cum successfully. Of course he was crushed, but I just couldn’t climax. I don’t know if I was too focused on something else or I was just hoping that this fool would hear my “cries of pleasure” and get the fuck off of me. Either way I couldn’t take it any longer.

There is certainly an art to faking an orgasm. Hell, your performance might be so believable your own moaning might create the orgasm you were trying to fake. The key to faking an orgasm is never over act. You have to make it as believable as possible. Also, it doesn’t hurt to have a satisfied look on your face after the deed is done. It looks like your reliving the moment when he “took you to so called ecstasy” bwahahahahahaha. Now this is for extreme circumstances: If for some reason he is unsure your acting skills and actually accuses you of faking it *well I never*, jump on top of him and get him in the mood again. This time take the lead, you never know you might not have to fake it on the second go round.

Cum Hard & Prosper


Top Five Test Men Always Fail

So the other night my boo and I were talking about relationships. The topic of tests women give men came up and he said that I tried to test him the other day. At first I laughed it off, but then I stopped and realized he was hip to the game. Ladies, men aren’t as clueless as we think. Men catch our double sided questions, but never really address it. The days of saying shit just to see what he says may be coming to an end. We try to ask questions to kinda trap him into answering. We wanna see if he says the right thing or if you ask him the same question two different ways at different times you wanna see will his answer be the same. Although some men *like my boo* may know the deal, there are a few men out there that still don’t know their ass from their elbow. I’ve decided to list 5 tests that men always fail.

1. Do I Look Fat in This?~ This is one of the most popular questions women ask men. Some men not understanding when a woman asks something that the truth isn’t always what she wants to hear. Being dumb you say “You look fat, but not fat fat” that just starts a whole bunch of shit. A woman wants you to lie even when she wants you to tell the truth. She may think she’s fat, but if you confirm it she automatically thinks you find her unattractive and obese. Learn to choose your words carefully or feelings will get hurt.

2. I’m On My Period, Still Wanna Hang Out?~ Ok, I’m guilty of this one. If a woman asks you this question basically she’s trying to establish her status. If a woman tells you she’s on her period and you say  “well we can hang out some other time” all she is to you is a fuck. The only reason you spend time with her is in hopes that her panties come off. Now if she asks you this the best thing to say is yes because you may never see an inch of that vagina again.

3. Are You Seeing Anyone Else?~ Women want to know the truth, but they expect a lie. What I mean by that is; a woman thinks she wants you to be honest but the second you tell her the truth all hell breaks lose. A woman wants to hear what she wants to believe. Yes, I’m saying sometimes you gotta lie to keep a happy home. The minute you tell her the truth or tell her you use to sleep with so and so you will never hear the end of it.

4. Who’s The Best You Ever Had? ~ This is a question she’s trying to trip you up with so be careful. Of course men fuck because their dicks need to be placed in something warm. So yea they have a couple notches on their belts, and some chicks were better than others. When a woman asks that question just generally speaking, it’s never really a general “I wanna get to know you” question. If you name one girl in particular that woman will assume that’s the one woman that she has to compete with even if there is really no competition. If you two are already sleeping together and she asks that question she’s expecting you to say her name even if it’s not true. Again a woman is looking for the truth but appreciates a lie to make her feel better.

5. My Cable Is Due And I’m So Broke~ Fellas, you know what this is about right? If a woman says anything about a bill needing to be paid chances are she’s hoping you would offer to pay for it. She won’t come out and ask you, well some do but she will hope that you offer. Some women don’t really want the money, it’s the offer of the money that she’s looking for. A woman wants to know that the man she’s giving the pussy to has her back in a financial situation. If she ever needs it she knows that you’re there to help. Now some chicks just out right ask for the money. These women are on some different shit. Basically if they ask for the money and you say or act like you ain’t got it you’re labeled as a broke ass. They will never ever ever take your ass seriously.

Dudes, please look out for any of these tests that I’ve mentioned. There are more, but honestly I ain’t got the kind of time to type all that. You’ve probably heard one or two of those above. Take heed cause these chicks outchea trying to trap you in your obvious web of lies. Ol lying ass men lol.

The Art of Cheating…For Dummies *Vintage*


Let me put this out in the open; people cheat. You may not like or condone it, but it happens. Maybe you’ve been cheated on and remember the heartbreak you faced when you found out. *Rubbing back* It’s gonna be ok …you know why because this blog isn’t for you. Go to another room because I’m talking to the folks that wanna cheat but don’t know what the best approach is. I’m not promoting cheating of any kind, but if you do decide to get your shit somewhere else wouldn’t you like to do it the best possible way? I’ve came up with 6 tips to ensure that you are a successful cheater.

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Ask V.I.~I Wanna Ruin His Life…Can You Help Me?


Hi VI,

So first I want to start by saying I loooove Candy diares. You keep me more than entertained at work. I check everyday for new postings and u never let me down with the realness.

So I have an issue I’m going through. I was dating a guy with a child for a little over a year. He was practically living with me and I was basically supporting him as I thought a woman should when her man is going through hard times. Well we definitely went through it and after a year I find out that he’s been living a double life with his baby’s mom. I’m hurt beyond words, I went through hell and hot water with this boy, and yes I said boy and gave him multiple chances to be honest with me and he just lied and lied n lied. Now that I know the truth, I want revenge. I want to say something to the girl, not to hurt her because she really had nothing to do with how he treated me. I just to hurt him as much as he hurt me. Now he’s off living this perfect family life and I’m stuck picking up the pieces of my broken heart and its hard. The thing is I know if i say something his lil family will be ruined and his son will most likely be taken from him. Since I’ve known him I know that if nothing else matters to him in this world. That boy loves the shit out of his son. I don’t want to be no home-wrecker but I didn’t sign up for this hurt and don’t think I should just have to accept that for a whole year I was loyal, faithful, and honest to someone who doesn’t even know the meaning of those words.

How do I get over this and get my revenge without tearing a child away from his father???

Revenge Seeker

Dear RS,

Revenge is sweet, but it doesn’t mend  a broken heart. Sweetie you got played. Point blank and period. This shit happens in relationships, you might get hurt. Loving someone other than yourself isn’t easy, if it was there would be happy folks in this world. Your bitter and angry and you want them to hurt just as much as you do, but when it’s all said and done your still gonna be hurt. You said your intention for telling the woman isn’t to hurt her, but your still gonna hurt her correct? It’s like you want to make it known to her that he ain’t shit because he wasn’t shit to you. If he wasn’t shit to you and you were loyal to him chances are this isn’t the first time he did shit like this and I guarantee you she knows about it.

The first mistake you made was, he was living with you and you were supporting him. You were only with dude a year and you already wanted to play husband and wife? Boo, love is grand and all but if your pulling the weight and he’s not doing shit to contribute other than giving you dick then what’s the point of calling him your man? He’s just a dude that gives you dick if that’s the case. You moved too quickly into this that you didn’t really know who you were dealing with in this relationship. You know the consequence of telling this chick might be that she separates him from his son. That is a territory that you shouldn’t even touch. By doing that shit how is this benefiting your heart? You taking a child from his father because your bitter? Chile you need to get up out of that and move on. Yes it’s difficult to do in the beginning, but time does heal all. Just be glad you found out before the shit got deeper. What if you got pregnant and had to raise this child alone? What if you got something from this kneegrow that penicillin couldn’t cure? You gotta be blessed that you got out unscaved.

So my recommendation is chill on that revenge thing. Karma is sweeter than revenge and I believe how you do people is how people will do you. It all comes back to the person, and once it does your hands are clean. You did nothing to get back at the person so you can’t feel guilty later on down the line when something happens.

I’ve really hoped I’ve helped you see things clearer in some way. I am not an expert, I just give my opinions as I see fit. The decision is ultimately yours to make, so I hope you make one that is in your best interest. Keep me posted!



One Size Does Not Fit All

It kills me when men have a distorted perception on the sizes of their dicks. Some actually walk around thinking that their packing the meat, when they’re truly not. Men love to talk about how much they will kill you with the it, and how it’s so big you won’t be able to take your eyes off of it. Then they try to seal the deal with pulling out the gold label (Magnum) and you become all a flutter, because everyone knows there is no small size when it comes to mags.

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Ask V.I.~How Do I Tell My Husband “You’re Not The Father”?

Hello V.I.,

I am truly stressing and I need some serious advice. I’ve been married about 5 years now and 3 years ago my husband and I started having marital issues. We started arguing way too much, so there was a point where we sorta separated. I went out one night with my friends and met this guy. We started exchanging texts and meeting for drinks. One night we slept together, which I instantly regretted. I felt so weird sleeping with someone that wasn’t my husband. I broke things off with the guy and had a long talk with my hubby and we decided to make things work.

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Ask V.I.~ The Not So Best-Friend *Vintage*


Dear V.I,

I’m writing to you because I have a rather delicate situation on my hands. My bestfriend has been seeing this guy for about 6 months now and she’s head over heels in love. We were out together one night and saw him. I admit we both looked interested in him, but he came up to her. It wasn’t a huge deal to me, because I was sorta seeing someone. They started getting closer and closer while my boyfriend and I grew farther and farther apart. Well one night we went to a mutual friend’s party and she brought her man along. I drove my car because I came through straight from work. We were having a great time when she got a call from her mom and she had to leave because of some kind of small family emergency. For some reason her boyfriend wanted to stay so she was pissed but asked me if I could drive him home. It was no big deal to me, so I said sure.

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A Wedding Ring Doesn’t Stop Him From Dating

Ladies, have you ever met a man that just seemed too good to be true? He says the right things, gives you attention then you find out he’s not worth a damn? You find out every thing that you had with this person was basically a lie. The man who you thought you knew and love wasn’t yours in the first place? Earlier this year I was talking to a friend of mine and she was ranting and raving about this new man she met. Talked about how compassionate he was and how he was so into her. So being all nosy and shit I asked her  basic questions about the man like “Where does he live” “Does he have any kids” “What does he do for a living” so on and so forth. She seemed to stutter when she answered. That’s when I realized, she really didn’t know much about him. I found that suspect as hell, but I didn’t want to crush her dreams of happiness with this stranger.

Last week she called me crying her eyes out and told me that she found out the man she has been with and introduced to her momma was MARRIED. His whole life was a lie. He told her that he had his own apartment, but was really using one of his friend’s place whenever she wanted to come over. He always made excuses as to why he couldn’t see her all the time or call her. Saying that he spent a lot of time taking care of his sick momma. Do you know how she found out? His damn wife contacted her and told her that the man she knew as Robert was actually named James and they have been married for 7 years. I really didn’t know what to say cause girl was going crazy over the phone, but I knew something was up by the way she would talk about him over the past couple months. She said she never suspected it, but now that she looks back at it there were signs that she obviously ignored.

So many women are being fooled by married men out here and have no clue. Ladies, I read an article on AdultDatingSites.Net by Brianna Phillips “10 Signs To Look At To Know If The Man Hitting On You Is Married. You have to read this article. Brianna breaks down all the little inconsistencies when it comes to married men. I actually forwarded the link to my friend and she said everything on the list reminded her of Robert…I mean James or whoever the hell he is.

I really don’t understand why people get married if they’re clearly not ready. Anyway I hope the article helps any other woman out there that might question her man’s credibility. Check the list and if half of the things on that list applies to your man then chances are he was never yours to begin with.

Holla at me: Have you ever dated a married man? If so, is the list accurate?



Ask V.I.~How Can I Tell My Man I’m A Porn Star?

Hi V.I.,

I just started recently dating this guy and I’m head over heels for him. We love the same things, have great conversation and have the same goals in life. When I met him I wasn’t interested in getting involved with anyone, but he just won me over. Now that we’re getting really close, I’m afraid to reveal something about myself. I’m a porn star! I started doing porn 2 years ago while in college and I’ve managed to have a very good career out of it. It was just suppose to be something I did to survive through college life, but I honestly love the money that I make so stopping right now is not an option.

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