So yesterday we covered the plight of the cheating man. You guys had a lot to say about the interview on the site and off. Today is part 2 of the interviews, and now we have a diferent scenerio. This interview was done with a woman who was formally in a cheating relationship with a married man. Yes, I said a married man. This interview works as the first one did…anonymously. I wanted to show a difference in how the “other person” thinks in this type of situation.
1. Describe your current relationship status. I’m currently single. I just ended the relationship I was having with a married man. I got tired of the lies and empty promises.
2. How long have you been in this relationship? I was in this relationship for a little over a year.
3. Did you know right away that he was married or did you find out after your relationship was established? No I didn’t know up front. I was looking him up in the secretary of state to make sure his businesses was legit and I found one was incorporated with a womens name. I then googled her and saw her myspace. That’s how I found out. Her pictures said it all. We had only known each other a month when I found out.
4. Did your feelings change after you found out? Yes…oddly enough I wanted him more.
5. Has he painted a bad picture of his marriage to make you believe that he’s unhappy? I wouldn’t say he’s painted a bad picture. He makes it sound as if he and she just don’t like eachother and are married because they have children. How true that is I’m sure I’ll never know.
6. Does the wife suspect anything? She knows about me. She and I have had a conversation and she’s seen pictures, text messages, and my number in his call log. She doesn’t care! She just goes on as if none of that ever happened.
7. Has this been the first relationship you’ve been involved in where you’ve been the “other” person? No not at all. Some willingly, some not so much.
8. If the situation where reversed and you were the one married and didn’t tell him upfront, do you think he would stick it out and try to make things work with you? Hmmm that’s a tough one. If he felt what I felt when I chose to stay I’d say yes. It’s something about him…us that I can’t explain. Even now that it’s over. I still have a desire to be with him.
9. Do the folks close to your relationship know about his marital status? His brother and close friends know about and have been around me. I even have relationships with them on my own. A couple of my close friends now and have met him as well. We’ve all hung out like it’s normal. That’s what makes it hard. Sometimes I’d forget his marital status. Sometimes I think he does too.
10. Do you think at the end of the day it is all worth the hassle and the drama? Nope. I don’t regret meeting him I just wish I would have handled the relationship differently. Maybe if I had I wouldn’t feel the hurt I feel now. I’d never advise anyone to do what I’ve done. It hurts all parties and nody wins..not even him.
I understand there are times you can’t control who you fall in love with, but staying in a relationship that involves deceit like that makes no sense. Yes your emotions get in the way and he/she says they love you, but leaving their spouse for something unknown isn’t gonna happen. In regards to the interview the fact that he never came out and told her upfront about his marriage should have drawn a clue. He never gave her the choice of dealing with it or leaving, he automatically made that choice for her. I’m not gonna sit here and say she shouldn’t have dealt with him because truth be told, she has no loyalty to his marriage. That’s on him. He chose to cheat and break his vows, but staying in something like that will never benefit you. Plus, if he happens to leave his wife which is a long shot what makes you think he won’t do the same shit to you?
Caribbean people have an old island saying “Do for do ain’t no obeah”. Which means you can’t expect to do something to someone and not expect any consequences. I’m glad she got out when she did because there was no good that would come from this relationship. Staying for the kids is only an excuse people use when they don’t want to face the truth about their relationship, or starting over just is too hard for them to do. Can I say I don’t see her going back to him? That would be a lie. As she clearly stated she still has strong feelings for him and her heart will eventually take over and the things her mind is telling her will be thrown out the window.
I wanna take our guest for participating in this interview, and I hope her heart heals from the hurt.
Holla at me: What are your thoughts regarding this interview or both of the interviews conducted?
